Everything Will Be Fine Now
by WolvieGal
Summary: It's Scott and Jean's Anniversary, but as Psylocke discovers, not everyone is celebrating.
1.

They're Marvel's, not mine, so neither are the lawsuits.  
  
It's Scott and Jean's anniversary, but as Psylocke discovers, not everyone is celebrating.  
  
  
Everything Will Be Fine Now  
  
  
Before my morning coffee the headache was indeterminable. I was so used to exerting my psychic energy to shielding my mind from my own ability to hear other peoples' thoughts that sometimes I continued to try to employ that power, even though it has been taken from me. That effort, on top of a morning that began before I wanted it to, and no coffee yet, was reverberating bloody thunder inside my skull. Releasing that futile effort to shield my mind against a nonexistent adversary only helped a little. Coffee and half a dozen aspirins did a little more. But a pounding still persisted.   
  
After my second cup I realized that the pounding wasn't in my head. It was coming from the Danger Room. So naturally I went to check it out. There wasn't anybody around so I started to wonder if maybe I'd slept through a training session. I glanced at the calendar. Nope. No group training sessions scheduled today-it's Scott and Jean's anniversary. They must have gone out celebrating. Everybody else must've gone with them.   
  
But when I looked down from the observation room window I saw someone exercising-scratch that-I saw someone nearing a berserker rage. I didn't need my telepathic ability to tell me something was wrong and that Wolverine was seriously ticked. But I knew better than to jump between him and his target, so I watched him for a while, waiting for him to calm down-again scratch that-this is Wolvie, he wouldn't calm down anytime soon. I waited for the rage to subside. But as I watched him, his rage only grew more intense. It was incredible to watch him slash through anything and everything that came near him. He was no longer mentally present, his consciousness in complete submission to the rage as his inner beast roared and attacked faster and faster. There was no strategy. He just killed every obstacle in the room. The Danger Room's program had difficulty keeping up with him. I'd seen him go berzerk several times, but I'd never had the opportunity to study him so intensely before. He never was the type to talk about it either. As the images came before him, sent their attacks against him, he didn't even bother trying to defend himself, not that they were left standing long enough to matter. The wounds that they did manage to inflict didn't even seem to increase his anger anymore. He was at a point where increase was no longer possible. Despite all of this, he never faltered, not once. I was reminded of just how dangerous he is, and I gained a new respect for my teammate and his constant inner struggle.   
  
He'd had all the controls set to the maximum capacity. I slowly began to decrease the intensity level of his exercises. The exercises slowed, but he didn't. So I kept decreasing them slowly until his rage began to release him. The pause between attacks against him finally distracted Wolverine, and he looked up to the observation room window.   
  
I could tell by his stance and visibly laboured breathing that he'd been at this a while, and it had to have been a long while if he was this taxed by his efforts. I wondered just how long he could sustain a rage like that. They didn't happen often enough, nor were they brought on by such trivial matters as would justify their frequency; so my next question was: what happened? I thought about asking over the intercom, but decided against it. Wolverine's rage may have passed, but he was still angry, and an angry Wolverine is not someone I wanted to annoy. I knew from experience that trying to "handle" him would be worse than useless. He would be aware of the effort and would not appreciate it, which would just make him angrier...if I were lucky. It would behoove me to simply be considerate of him and his feelings. If I were that mad I wouldn't be in the mood to talk over an intercom. He knew me well enough to recognize my sincerity and not skewer me with his claws...I hoped.   
  
Fear doesn't come easily to me, and certainly not in reference to Logan. Logan is a friend. But I had to fight the urge to take my time walking down to speak with him in person. The only thing that kept me moving at a brisk pace was the thought of insulting Logan.  
  
He met me at the door. I looked him in the eyes. They were haggard and bloodshot. "Do you feel better, Logan?"  
  
"No."  
  
"What's wrong?"  
  
"Nothin' that concerns you Psylocke."  
  
"It wasn't a security threat or you'd be slashing bad guys instead of Danger Room images. So someone must've upset you personally. But there's no one here. They've all gone out to celebrate-oh. I'm sorry Logan." What could Jean have possibly done to him? The last time I saw him this upset over her was the day of Scott and Jean's wedding. "Is there something I can do?"  
  
"No. Not unless you can change the way things are. Jus' lemme blow some steam." He turned to resume his exercises.   
  
"Maybe you should blow some steam somewhere else and give the Danger Room time to recover." We both looked back. Smoke was rising from various machines and the whole place smelled like an over heated car engine.   
  
He turned again with a half a growl and stalked off. He was hurting and I knew it. And there was nothing I could do about it. Unless I could change the way things are. . . .  
  
* * *  
  
Around lunch time Beast came bounding out of his lab for "some much needed nourishment." He said, "It appears someone has set off a bomb in the Danger Room. Are you aware of the circumstances which put our Danger Room in its current state? I thought everyone had gone out with Scott and Jean."  
  
"Not everyone. Logan, uh, wasn't feeling well today."  
  
"Ah yes, our beloved Canadian does have a destructive temper. Well I do not believe that any damage done is unreversible. I shall see to it this afternoon." With that he stuffed a Twinkie in his mouth.  
  
"Hank, did anything happen this morning? Before Jean left? Or perhaps last night?"  
  
He swallowed the last of his Twinkie and furrowed his blue brow. "I believe I know of the incidents to which you make reference, Betsy. Though your telepathy is no longer with you, it seems you have assimilated its perception. Yes, Jean and Logan were talking last night in the kitchen while everyone else was watching Late Nite with Conan O'Brien. I saw them when I came in for popcorn."  
  
"Is that all?"   
  
"It seemed to be quite a pleasant and friendly conversation. Jean was rather exuberant and expressed no loss of affection for Logan. I do believe I saw her plaiting small blue flowers from the table arrangement into his trademark hairstyle. That is until Scott announced that he was going to bed. Jean was prompt to accompany him. It was then that Logan departed for Harry's, quite suddenly. He returned this morning just as Scott and Jean and the rest of the team were leaving. That was when I retreated to the solace of my lab."  
  
"Thank you Hank." I had my suspicions about what had set Wolvie off, but I don't think I'd ever missed my telepathy as much as I did then. Judging by the way Hank's glasses slid down his furry blue nose and the frown that creased his normally joyfully contented face, I think he knew it too.  
  
* * *   
  
The mansion's silence was invaded by the chatter and laughter of the returning party. I heard them enter from where I was waiting in the Rec Room. I met them in the hallway. My countenance made a striking contrast to their collective one. I heard Jubilee calling, "Wolvie! Wolvie where are you?" And I cringed for her.   
  
As everyone began to disperse I walked up to Jean. "I need to talk to you." She blinked her eyes and immediately scanned the forefront of my mind as well as the mansion grounds simultaneously. But I wanted her to have the benefit of my words, not my thoughts, so I blocked her out of my mind definitively. After having gained the added power of my telepathy she could have forced her way in, but what I didn't have in that power I made up for in temper and mood. In my anger I repelled her from my mind rather roughly, the equivalent perhaps of shoving her and knocking her down, which at that moment I had an intense desire to do; perhaps my friend Logan was rubbing off on me. Such treatment wasn't something Jean was used to. It seemed to set her off balance in more ways than one, conflicting with the joy that this very day represented for her. But doing it mentally prevented a scene. I turned on my heel and walked back to my room. I knew she would follow.  
  
By the time Jean came through the door I was seated smugly at my desk. "What's this all about Betsy?" Her cool was on the verge of cracking. I didn't answer. It was spiteful, but oh well. "This isn't funny, and I don't appreciate it." Her brows wrinkled.  
  
"You're right, it's not funny, and Logan doesn't appreciate it either." I said darkly. She seemed about to speak, but closed her mouth tightly instead.  
  
A moment passed in silence before she turned to close the door behind her. "I can't help his feelings for me. I'm sorry that his unrequited love throws him into a nasty mood, but there's nothing I can do about it."  
  
"You can't change his feelings Jean, but you can stop teasing him," and then more softly I said, "like you were doing last night."  
  
"I have to stop being his friend? Leave when he sits down at the table with me? We're teammates; I can't do that. It's ridiculous."   
  
"No one expects you to ignore his existence. But you're married to Scott, Jean. By now you should know that you can't stay up late at night smiling and batting your eyelashes at him, then toss him aside when your husband shows up, leaving him to suffer alone through whatever passions you've stirred up in him. You can't keep flirting with Logan, kindling that flame of hope that he still has a chance with you. He'd never act against your will, but you give an ambiguous representation of what it is you really want. Your flirting with him may be a joke to you, but it isn't a joke to him. He hasn't given up on you because you haven't proven that he needs to do so. You're toying with the man's emotions, and not just any man, but a man whose emotions have volatile power, a man who has the ability to take whatever he wants. He holds back because of that ring on your finger, but if you continue to ignore it, he might one day too. You're playing with forces you can't control, and someone else's gonna get hurt. Logan already is."  
  
She dropped down onto the edge of the bed, not saying anything. I thought she was starting to understand the grave consequences of her little flirtations. I hoped so, for Logan's sake.  
  
"How do you know?" She asked purposely not attempting to read my thoughts.  
  
"The same way we always know when Logan is upset. Hank is repairing the Danger Room. Didn't you notice how upset he was before you left this morning?"  
  
She didn't answer. From her it meant, "no."  
  
I softened my voice again. "It's your anniversary. No one blames you for being happy about it, happy enough to be distracted. Just keep in mind that you have what you want. Logan doesn't. You can't have Logan to flirt with and Scott to love. Give him the room to move on. After all these years you owe him that." I moved to leave but Jean stopped me with a question.  
  
"Where is he?"  
  
I turned my head to look at her. "I don't know. No one but Wolvie knows where he goes when he gets upset."  
  
"He was very upset when he left." It was a statement not a question.   
  
I nodded. "He's Wolverine. He'll be all right...now." That last word dripped with if.  
  
The door cracked open and a visored face poked in. "Everything all right Jean?" Scott asked.  
  
She jumped to her feet. "Yes."  
  
I finished for her. "Everything will be fine now."  



	2. 

Everything is Not All Right   
by WolvieGal   
  
-the characters aren't mine so neither are the lawsuits   
Sequel to Everything Will Be Fine Now   
Wolvie comes to talk to Psylocke about what she did in the last story PG-13   
  
I hardly had time to realize what was happening before Logan burst into my room, knocking the   
door off of two of its three hinges, leaving it horribly twisted, hanging (barely) askew by the last.   
"What the hell were you thinkin'?" His voice was low and there was a growl behind it sending   
chills down my arms and up my spine, raising the hair in the back of my neck. He was angry, but   
not hateful. Still, the heat of his eyes burned my back.  
I turned to face him. My heart was racing, but I refused to let my countenance slip before him, him   
of all people. *I am not a child. He will not treat me like one. I won't let him. I know what I've done,   
and I'll handle the repercussions thereof, not receive a lecture. A lecture? On second thought,   
there's no concern for that from Logan.* "Logan, my door." I stepped toward it slowly waiting for   
him to join me, keeping my voice calm. "A hand with the door?" I reached for one side of the door   
as Logan exhaled loudly, grabbed the other side of the door, and placed it roughly back into the   
frame.  
"I'm still waitin' fer and answer." He said while holding me steadily in his stare.  
I was thinking, Logan, that one of my friends was taking advantage of another of my friends   
without realizing the pain she was causing him." I took a step closer to him, watching him as he   
processed my words. I could hear him breathing. "And you would never admit it, let alone tell her   
so. You would rather let her tear your heart apart than see her frown when you corrected her."  
"You had no call to get involved, Psylocke. I told you that yesterday. I hafta deal with her bein'   
married to Cyke on my own."  
*This is going to turn into a horrible fight. I don't want to fight with you Logan, can't you see that.   
I'm just tired of standing by while people hurt you mercilessly.* But what I said was, "Destroying   
the Danger Room is not dealing, Logan."  
"Maybe not for you, but my dealing is my concern." He pointed a finger at me. His very stance   
was tense.  
"It became Hank's concern when he had to repair the damage to the Danger Room." I took a   
breath, determined to take control of the situation before it got out of hand, and barely above a   
whisper I continued. "And it became my concern when I saw a friend hurting and unable or   
unwilling to fix it because of the person from whom it came. "  
"What you did to Jean-" he began.  
My control, over myself and over the situation, was slipping. "What I did was help her to realize   
how better to treat-" I waved my hand at him in gesture. "-a dear friend. She's had time to think   
about it, and she agrees with me. She's not angry with anyone but herself, and that for not seeing   
it sooner."  
"On her anniversary-"  
"Yes, on her anniversary, the day right after she stomped on your heart for the last time."  
"Which was none of your business!" He snatched my wrist and jerked it, but not too roughly,   
upward and back toward himself, putting his face nearer my own. Through half gritted teeth he   
said. "Damn it, Psylocke. You-- Damn it." Absently his nose brushed mine.. and I pulled back his   
hand with his hold on my wrist and...I kissed him. I couldn't think. A moment, and then we   
snapped back from each other as the door gave up the ghost and slid to the floor with a loud   
THWACK.  
I looked down at my wrist where he'd held it. The heat from his flesh had warmed my skin. I put   
my other hand where his had been. *What was that?*  
I felt him looking at me. I took a deep breath and raised my head to meet his eyes. Logan   
grabbed both of my wrists this time and pulled me nearer by outstretching my arms...and he   
kissed me back. His manner was rough and his kiss hungry, predatory, almost like he was trying   
to swallow my soul. I couldn't resist him. Pulling my hands from his grasp again, after a slight   
struggle, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him against me. I was so lost that the   
sounds of voices from the hall gradually getting louder didn't even register in my mind.  
"What was that noise?" Jean asked.  
"It sounded like someone was breakin' in or something." Jubilee chimed in. "Look, it's Psylocke's   
room, maybe it's Sabretooth."  
"The door's down, watch out. It could be anyone or anything in there." Scott's voice was as   
serious as ever.  
"I just scanned the room." Jean said. "The only psychic readings I got were from Psylocke and   
Wolverine. Whatever they're fighting, it has no thought patterns, and it is intense."  
Then there was silence as a disappointed and disgusted sound erupted from Jubilee, almost like   
she'd taken a kick to the stomach. "Uhh--Augh--Ahh!"  
Logan and I let go of one another as if we had been electrocuted. Fireworks exploded into the   
room from the direction of the doorway. Jubilee's hoarsely whispering voice could be heard   
ringing, not only in the halls, but also in our ears. "Wolvie, how could you?"   
  



	3. 

-the characters aren't mine so neither are the lawsuits  
  
Nothing is All Right...As Usual  
sequel to Everything is Not All Right  
By WolvieGal  
  
Jean stormed off down the hall in the opposite direction of Jubilee, her heels clicking loudly. She radiated pure outrage, and as a telepath, she made sure the rest of us knew it, especially me. I realized what that last scene had to look like to her.   
  
"Enough games Betsy. What's going on here?" I didn't answer Scott. I didn't have the answer, even for myself. "Logan?"  
  
"You're the only one not involved in this Cyke. Keep it that way." Logan ducked and bolted for the doorway. Cyke had already moved out of his way before I pulled him back and bound him with my teke. It was instinct, but he fought against it with gritted teeth. Until he saw the look of concentration on my face. The he resorted to growling. "Let me go after her!"   
  
"Wait Logan-" I began.  
  
But he couldn't. SNIKT. His claws exploded from his fists. Not even my teke could hold those back. "Let me go to her now! Or you'll have to hold me like this forever!"  
  
"Let me talk to her first! She'll be angry, let her be angry with me, not you."  
  
It almost seems as if he paused to think, but no one thinks that quickly. "Can't play with her like that. She's young, she's not dumb. And her anger is for me, she said so, let her direct it to the right person. Bets, let me go, now."  
  
I couldn't argue with him, especially not when he was right. There was fire in him. I'd seen it. And now I'd even tasted it. But I knew I couldn't control it, or fight it. And I knew I couldn't hold it. As I released him he hit the floor running, as if I had never stopped him in the first place. He never looked back. I sunk to the floor. I'd forgotten Scott was still in the room.  
  
"I can't ignore this. What is the problem?" I started at the sound of his voice, but I didn't answer. "Will someone tell me what is going on around here?"  
  
"I'm not going to cross Logan." *I did that earlier today, and look where it got me. Bloody confused. Not again.* "If you want to know ask somebody else. Your wife at least knows the beginning of the story." And I got up. I had an idea.  
  
"What story?" Scott asked.   
  
"Ask Jean."  
  
***  
  
I figured that they wouldn't be too hard to find, so long as Logan's scoot was still here, which it was. Jubilee wasn't exactly known for being particularly quiet. But I had to know. I had to know what he was telling her, how he was explaining that moment, the event that I didn't want to name-not that I couldn't, I just didn't choose to do so. I had to know because I didn't know myself. I had to know because I needed to hear it too. Whatever he told her, I had to know.  
  
From the window I saw Jubilee rollerblading down the sidewalk. Logan came out of the mansion and stood on the porch. He called to her. She stopped, like a reflex. She picked up one foot as if to go to him, but then she turned around and went off the other way. I almost turned around right there. It seemed to me that the conversation wasn't going to happen when I thought it would. But then he took off after her. He surprised me, running after her like that. It just didn't seem like his typical response. When he caught up to her he grabbed one of her hands. She circled around him to a stop, tethered by her own arm. This was the part I had to hear. I wrapped a telekinetic bubble around myself to prevent noise or scent from alerting them-or Logan really-to my presence and hid around the corner of the garage.  
  
"What was that all about?" Logan asked Jubilee.  
  
"All what?" Her attitude was in fifth gear. But other than that she was a lot calmer than I'd expected. I had expected to see a fireworks show that would put the Fourth of July to shame.  
  
"You know what I mean, darlin'." He sounded just like a father.  
  
"What did you expect? Am I supposed to just sit back and watch that, and what, smile? No way. So why don't _you_ tell _me_ what that was all about?" I didn't realize that I was holding my breath waiting for an answer.  
  
"It was just a kiss. Nothing for you to go into an uproar over." I _was_ just a kiss.  
  
"Just a kiss? Jean psi-scanned the room before we walked in and said it was intense. So intense she thought you two were fighting something, machines or space aliens or something without brain waves. Doesn't sound like 'just a kiss' to me." And word from a telepath, no thought included. Just a thoughtless kiss. So why was I still listening?  
  
"What does that matter to you?"  
  
"I can't believe you said that! If I didn't know that it would probably like break my hand I'd slap you, Wolvie."  
  
"Explain yourself darlin'."  
  
"Don't you dare try to pretend that you don't know."  
  
"Alright kiddo, what do you think I'm pretending to be ignorant of?"  
  
"Me!" And she yanked her hand back out of his.  
  
He chuckled very faintly. "How could I ever forget about you? You'd never let me. What is this really about? Did I forget your birthday, or something? Well it couldn't have been your birthday cuz that's two months away."  
  
"Me, Wolvie, me." And then she started to cry. I'd only seen her do that once or twice before. And both times it was because Logan was in danger.  
  
"I don't understand, darlin'." He took a step closer and reached out to hug her. She started to fight, but with no strength, no real intention of getting away. But even if she had, I don't think he would've let her. She just gave in. She seemed to fall into place with her head resting right at the spot where his neck met his shoulder. It was natural. They belonged that way. He rubbed her back and she just let loose.   
  
"I love you Wolvie. Can't you see that?"  
  
"I know you do darlin' an' I love you too." At that she pulled back from him.  
  
"Wolvie, don't you hear me? I _love_ you."  
  
"Jubes, what does this conversation have to do with you literally exploding and running out of Psylocke's room?" Then his back went stiff as he put the pieces together. He looked down at her, not much, she was almost as tall as him with her rollerblades on. And she looked right back up at him. "Darlin'-"  
  
"Don't try to talk me out of it! And don't tell me how young I am. Everyone in the X-men has been trying for years. They all know. You are like the only one who doesn't, or didn't. And don't ask me if it's so. It's so!"  
  
"That's not what I was going to say. Why do you wait 'til now to get upset? You had to know she's not the only woman I've kissed since I met you."  
  
"I know," she closed her eyes and rested her forehead against his chest, "but now I'm old enough to like defend my feelings. I mean I was thirteen. I was a kid, and even though I'm only seventeen now-and I know how young that is-I don't have much longer before I am an adult." She looked up at him. "You don't age Wolvie, you look the same as the day I first saw you, except for that you were dyin', but I do. And I have. I'm not the little girl you first met."  
  
"Two months." He said. She nodded.  
  
"I'm s-sorry. I guess my reaction was a bit much, and maybe even childish, but I was just starting to think that I-"  
  
"Would be old enough to...?" He left rest unsaid.  
  
"And now I have to contend with Betsy? There's no way. Next to her I'll always be a little girl." It was just then that the realization that I was eavesdropping was hitting me, but I couldn't tear myself from the spot.  
  
"That's right. You'll always be a little girl. You'll always be _my_ little girl. Even when you're old an' gray."  
  
She looked truly sad. Only the tiniest shadow of hope on her face as she said, "Is that all I'll ever be? Can't I just be yours?"  
  
"Jubes, darlin'-"  
  
"Wolvie, don't say no. Just don't. Look, when this conversation is over I'll pretend like we never had it, okay? Just promise me that we can talk about it again another time, like later."  
  
"You mean in two months?" he asked.  
  
"Maybe. Maybe not right away. Just don't tell me no, okay? Please, don't break my heart twice in one day. Just promise me."  
  
"Okay, I promise. Later."  
  
"Before this conversation is over I have one more question." She said.  
  
"Oh yeah, what's that?"  
  
"About Psylocke, are you an' her, I mean is she-is she gonna be like my rival?"  
  
"I don't think you'll have to worry about that, darlin'."  
  
"Then why were you kissin' her?"  
  
"I don't know. She kissed me first. I guess I was just bein' polite, returnin' the favor."  
  
***  
  
"Just what do you think you're doing?" I was so enthralled I never heard her approach. Jean's voice was only in my head, thank goodness. Otherwise my cover would have been blown.  
  
In my head where I knew she would hear me I said, "I realize that I owe you an explanation, and probably an apology. So let's go back inside and I'll get started."  
  
"If what is going on around that corner is any indication then I think I have an idea of what you're going to say, Betsy. But I want to hear it from you now. Keep it in your head. I'll step into your bubble and they'll never know we're in hearing range."  
  
"Logan was upset because of what I said to you. We were discussing that when-I was caught up in the heat of the moment. I suppose it didn't mean anything. I certainly wasn't planning it when I spoke to you, or at all for that matter. No it didn't mean anything."  
  
"But you were checking just to be sure." I nodded. Bloody hell! How I hated not having my telepathy.   
  
"I've done almost exactly what I chastised you for doing. I apologize."  
  
"It's all right. What you told me wasn't wrong, just well over due. Rest assured that you at least have not hurt him with your attention." Jean said with all the poise I'd come to expect in her, while I was reduced to a cowering, honorless, dog.  
  
"Is he that charming?" I asked, and I couldn't hold back my smile.  
  
"In his own way. Just don't tell him or he'll get worse. And don't tell Remy either, he'd be scandalized."  
  
"I wouldn't mind if we kept this whole day to ourselves." I said.  
  
Jean nodded her agreement. "Scott's going to drive himself crazy because he doesn't understand what happened." She paused then shrugged and said, "Why not share the insanity? Just for fun we could tell both Logan and Remy how charming Logan is and let all the men around here chase their tails." She barely contained her giggle.  
  
"Except Hank. We should get Rogue and Ororo to come with us while we hang unmercifully to Hank's furry-blue-person." I added.  
  
"Yes, and Jubilee too." That sentence did not go unemphasized. "All the X-women, in something of a devious bonding exercise. Chaos, as usual."  
  



	4. 

-the characters aren't mine so neither are the lawsuits  
  
  
Chaos is All Right  
Epilogue to the Everything Will Be Fine storyline  
  
by WolvieGal  
  
Betsy's Journal  
  
I've been awaiting Jubilee's birthday almost as much as she has, maybe more. We all know what it means. She has been more nervous than I have ever seen her. She's been spending a lot of time alone. That in itself is not so unusual, but at least when she retreats to her room the door bloody rattles from the level of music she plays in there. Her room has been silent for almost eight weeks straight.  
  
I know what she's thinking. I'm thinking it too. Logan took off on one of his little jaunts the day after Scott and Jean's anniversary. We all expected him to. That's his way. And he comes back when he feels like it, or if there's an X-tra special need. He seems to know when to reappear. We never know when to expect him. So when he disappeared from his room at the same time as the keys to his scoot, Jubilee almost added flight to her mutant powers en route to the garage. I was right behind her. But she wouldn't have noticed me if I'd have had a full brass band with me. Her attentions were elsewhere.  
  
My teke bubble sprung up as if I'd been eaves dropping all my life. But something stirring in me was overpowering the guilt I felt about it. I just kept thinking that I had a right to know. I was the reason this whole thing had started in the first place. I was the one who kissed him. I deserved to know.  
  
He was strapping his bag to his scoot when she threw herself onto the back of it panting. Without looking up at her he said, "You're not comin' darlin'."  
  
"I know." She was still. And he kept working without looking up. When he was done he planted his hands on the seat in front of her. He had something to say but he didn't want to. "Wolvie, I've seen you leave like dozens of times, maybe hundreds. But I never get used to it. The only good thing is that sooner or later you come back. And I watch for you every day that you're gone, hoping to see your scoot come around the corner. After yesterday I don't blame you for needing some time away from this." She stopped and took a soft slow breath. "I would ask, or even beg for you to take me with you, but I know that it's not the mature thing to do. I know you need some time alone. I want you to have it. I don't know if I'm gonna like doing the mature thing, but I have to grow up don't I?"   
  
He met her eyes. "Jubes-"  
  
"I'm not done, Logan, I'm not done." She waited for him to close his mouth before she continued. "I'm not gonna ask to come with you. I'm not gonna try to make you stay, not like it'd work anyway. I'm not even gonna ask you for a good-bye, cuz I know you don't do those. But I am gonna ask you for one thing. Will you do one thing for me? Logan?"  
  
His voice was so low I could barely hear it. "I can't promise what I don't know darlin'. Tell me Jubes."  
  
"Be here for my birthday. No matter what you decide, about a certain postponed conversation. No matter what happens after you answer that question. Be here for me on my birthday. Be here for your little girl."  
  
"I promise Jubes." She slid off of his scoot. He hugged her, quickly, fatherly, and left.  
  
I can't believe it, but I was jealous.  
  
***  
  
Two months later...Jubilee's Birthday...her 18th...  
  
She didn't sleep at all last night. I know because I didn't either. She was on her tip toes all day. My heart was in my bloody throat. She didn't eat. I consumed enough coffee to drown a horse. The afternoon and its celebrations came and went. Jubilee smiled with her mouth, but her eyes said something else entirely. Everyone knew what-or who-she was missing. And no one said a word. But no one knew about the promise...except me. And I was depending on it almost as much as she was. If he didn't accept her as more than a daughter.... I can't even finish the thought. Not in my own bloody head or on paper. She never trusted me. Now I can see why.  
  
He said it was nothing. Maybe it was. Maybe all this fuss was over nothing. But I can't shake the idea that I felt something in him that I have never felt before. And I yearn for it again. Is it just my own loneliness? Or is it his? And what of Jubilee? She has waited years for this. And now on the very eve of it's commencing should I-could I-step in and take it from her? If I were her I would have eliminated me by now, one way or another. She has heeded well the lessons taught to her. Xavier would be proud. If he knew of this. Logan will be proud. I'll see to that. I owe it to her.  
  
Her birthday dinner plate returned to the kitchen rearranged, but not unburdened. When all the presents had been opened, and candles had been blown out, and the cake had been cut, and the guests had left, she disappeared. My heart sunk for her. Where was he? But a tiny voice kept whispering, "He will come."  
  
The ticking of the clock finally got to me at ten past eleven and I compacted it into a cube the size of a die. In the silence that followed I heard Jubilee crying from the other side of the wall. Somehow listening to her cry appeased my own tears. I don't know how long she cried for the both of us that night. Then abruptly she stopped. I heard her footsteps as she bolted downstairs before I heard the roar of Logan's scoot. I crept out to follow her, but stopped short as she sat down at the bottom of the stairs, and waited. At first I was surprised. But then I thought, "Good for you."  
  
He came in quietly and yet he filled the room to bursting. Ever so softly he whispered, "Happy birthday Jubes. Did I make it in time?" She nodded and rose to her feet as he came to a stop in front of her. He pulled a teddy bear wrapped in a red ribbon out of his bag and handed it to her. "For my little girl on her birthday."   
  
She took the bear and held it against her. Then hugged him. "Thanks, Wolvie." She sat back down on the stairs and he dropped down next to her.  
  
"Jubes, no use skirtin' around it. If you wanna have that talk now... I have a present for a grown up Jubilee, too." His hand darted into the pocket of his leather jacket.  
  
She leaned against him, resting her head on his shoulder. "I don't want to grow up Wolvie. I don't want to grow up if it means I have to chance not having you. I want this, and I refuse to risk it, not on any gamble." She looked up at him. "Maybe someday that'll change. Maybe someday what's risky now will be set in stone. Maybe then I'll grow up. But not today."  
  
He hugged her. "Whatever you want Jubes." His voice sounded strained.  
  
They sat there on the stairs all night, talking, just like they always had, until Jubilee couldn't keep her eyes open. She went to bed just as the sun began to rise, and Logan went outside to greet it. I followed him. I didn't know what to say, or if to say anything at all. So I kept silent, while I watched him reach into his pocket and pull out a small black box. Without my teke bubble I'm certain he must've known I was there. He confirmed it when he began to speak just loudly enough for me to hear. "No diamonds, no stones, no engraving, just a plain white gold band. The only one like it I've ever bought. Not a wedding ring, not an engagement ring, nothing so serious. Just a promise ring, for all the promises I've made to her, and all the ones I will make. When she's grown up. Maybe someday. But not today." He looked at it for a moment before stuffing it back into his pocket and going inside.  
  
I stood outside alone, and I cried. But I am not sure who the tears were really for.  
  



End file.
